Wednesday, February 4, 2015


I cannot believe this film came out 24 years ago. Do you know how many times I rewound our VHS, or yelled at someone else for rewinding it when I wasn’t finished yet? A lot. Meanwhile, I had the pleasure of re-watching it with my children, who have been recently obsessed with Jake and the Neverland Pirates. I felt that it was time for them to know the real deal.

As I watched it with them, I silently (ok, not so silently, I talked through the film like a damn parrot) noticed a few things that were totally, completely lost on me as a child.

  1. The Parents’ Point of View is a Thing
    I never thought of this as emotionally straining for a parent to deal with. Confronting their childhood issues, revisiting relatives, forgetting relatives names, oh and that part about avenging a soul who DARE lays a finger on their kid.
  2. Stockholm Syndrome
    Whoa, whoa, whoa. WTF. Ok, Captain Hook doesn’t just kidnap Pan’s children, the dude immediately takes very premeditated steps to make the children LOVE him. More than that, he notices right away that one child (the daughter) won’t be swaded, and immediately starts to work on the emotional instabilities of the boy. Christ. Which brings me to….
  3. Captain Hook Actually exists
    Something I don’t plan on telling my children for a while, only because they’re 3 and 5 -- at this point, knowledge of pure evil won’t prepare them, it’ll give them nightmares. But we ALL know, or have heard of or have watched the news and SEEN murderous, torturous, sociopathic pricks with mommy-issues. It’s a thing, and it’s more than just something found on a pirate ship or a story book.
  4. The Themes behind “Time” will Blow Your Mind
    Of course we’re all aware of “Never”land and the “Never”Children (which should, by the way, be called the Always Children, and Always Land..). Ok, remember the Tick Tock Croc? Exactly. Time theme. But more than that, it’s a symbolism of how time “robs” from you. Captain Hook was terrified of the Croc attacking him, but this morphed into a real-time phobia of all time-pieces. So much so, that he aimed to destroy them. All clocks. Ridding all clocks from “Never”land, defying the physicality of a clock and the intangibility of time.
    WIthout time, no one grows old -- also the Neverkids are orphans. Like, legit orphans. Not just a buncha hooligans with nothing better to do.
  5. All adults are Pirates. This includes you.
    “Peter…. you’re a Pirate!” This is what older Wendy says when she learns about Peter’s successful business antics. But when we look back at our own careers, winning the job over other people, helping the company acquire clients or sales or partnerships over other competitors… we’re all tasked with “blowing them out of the waters!”
  6. Grown-up Jokes
    “THAT’S a Paramecium-Brain!” As well when the writers read my mind and threw in a “What is this, a Lord of The Flies preschool?” So many other grown-up nuances that were just delightful.
  7. Robin Williams profoundly mentions Life & Death in Every Role He’s Ever In
    Just as I said. Since August, coincidentally, nearly every movie I've taken in has featured the late-great Robin Williams -- and he speaks VERY PROFOUNDLY about life and death in every one. And yes in every one I get the chills and pretend I didn’t even notice it.
  8. Dustin Hoffman will always be Captain James Hook
    And Willy Loman. But that’s it.
  9. Disney Constantly Over-estimates the Attention Span of Children
    Even 90’s children. Seriously, it’s just too damn long.

But when you make it through, worth every second --- SOOOO worth it!

Thursday, October 30, 2014


Sheryl Sandberg created a campaign to ban the word Bossy from our vocabulary, citing that it's really only used towards girls, and deters them from exhibiting or feeling comfortable exhibiting "executive leadership" traits. Or, well, being a boss.

She's gotten a lot of backlash on the campaign, but I think that the underlying, take-home message should be that we all aught to be careful about the rhetoric we use with our kids.

And this is coming from a woman who's committed nearly all of the cardinal mommy-sins.
I have a Bachelor's Degree in Communications, and I still find it hard knowing exactly the right thing to say or merely express towards my children.

Every once in a while I hear a parent tell their kids to stop "tattling" on their siblings or not to be a "tattle tale." And I'm sure that they all want to communicate the same thing: "You haven't tried to work this problem out on your own, so at this point all it looks like all you're doing is trying to get your brother in trouble."

But instead, you're calling your child a name.

That's it. You're telling your child that "I know you're coming to me with a problem, I know that someone's making you feel uncomfortable, and my answer is to insult you. And not to help you solve your problem."

My kids are still pretty little. But I feel fairly confident in saying that if I don't listen to my kids' relatively small problems now, they won't want to tell me about the 'big stuff' later on. Cause to them, it's always been big stuff.

So the next time your son or daughter is being hurt or feels uncomfortable, try not to pass it of, and please don't discourage their open communication. If kids think that their words don't matter, they may stop using them - opting for physical responses or even worse, using hurtful names and demeaning rhetoric that has more force than they will ever truly realize.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014


As Per the Blog Request by my Internet Marketing Channels Professor
Image courtesy:

Don’t Purchase a List

1 There are no Opt-Ins
If you purchase even qualified e-mail contacts, every one of those contacts has no idea that you, specifically, are going to be sending them an e-mail. At all. They may have some crazy idea that their e-mail address is up for sale in some obscure database, but generally they’re banking on their spam filter to filter you out. Which it might do.

2 Rely on your Company’s Magnitude
Allow potential customers to find YOU. Place an e-mail/newsletter sign-up field on your company website. A lot of e-mail marketing tools like Constant Contact have widgets/apps that can be applied to Facebook Company pages for easy opt-in sign ups.

3 Rely on your own Mining efforts
You know where your clients are, right? For instance, if you’re a B2B software company, you might sponsor tradeshows and have the option of gathering leads from registerants / event attendees.

4 Card collecting
I represent my company everywhere I go. Given me your card? You’ll be hearing from me.

Purchase a List

5 Get References
So you think you’ve found a few contenders for list purchases? Which one has the best references? Like, real references. Someone who’s willing to put their real name on the line for recommending services. Someone with actual data as to how their List Purchase experience went.

6 Verify bounce rate, accuracy and resell
Generally, a hard bounce rate of 15% or lower should be guaranteed. List providers need to provide a contract which outlines that contacts will be replaced if a hard bounce is above an agreed upon percentage. Aim for the highest accuracy guarantee possible (>85%) and an understanding of how many times each contact is sold in a given year. (This based on my own personal experience purchasing lists)

7 Have an idea of ROI
The margins are thin. Do you know how much an average sale will bring you? Do you know the lead conversion rate of your industry? These are all important things to hunt down before making the list purchase leap.

8 Onboard and Segment like a Boss
Once you have an insane e-mail marketing campaign lined out, know how to onboard your list to your e-mail marketing platform. Are you e-mailing to several different regions? Are you e-mailing across verticals? These all need to be captured and tagged as best as you can - making e-mail campaigns are relevant and as personal as possible is the only way to go.